Monday, September 9, 2013

your life, their entertainment

You know what's funny about internet dating? Everything. Every damn thing is funny. Profiles are funny, pictures are funny.. and people. These people have lost their freakin' minds. It has become like a made for TV movie that we star in... for free.

The internet dating world is at its maximum capacity for harboring relationship refugees. The members are like zombies, moving from one victim to the next leaving regrets, destruction, and mangled hearts. Everyone is just the mask they wear... Normalcy does not exist here.

Fat people put up face shots taken at an angle, in the dark... with a filter. Fish face, close up smile...eyes only. Pictures of pets, and senior high school portraits.
Lonely people use exclamation points after everything. "I'm loving life! I love football! I hike on the weekends! I'll make you laugh!" "I'm so lonely!" "I have 10 cats!"

The desperate talk about their never ending search for 'the one'. How they love with everything they have from head to toe and will treat you like royalty if you just give them a chance... just a chance. Just one...
Players post half naked pictures of themselves with members of the opposite sex. There is always some caption about a best friend or relative... blah blah blah

Rejected people stalk, introverts don't show up, and extroverts serial date.
The religious want to pray for you, the creepy ones want to meet you in parking lots, and the "busy" ones (aka married)?! They never pick up your call, only answer back over text, and won't meet you anywhere.

Women will bitch til you're hitched and men fuck and duck.

What a confusing hot mess! What a ridiculous, perverted, form of entertainment.

I bet the person who created internet dating is sitting somewhere laughing his ass off.

Bravo